It’s Never Too Late
The cases of Frank and Barbara hold up hope for all of us to grow, learn our lessons, and graduate from the college of life. It’s never too late to become who you were always meant to be. Barbara was in her mid sixties when she began this work, Frank in his late fifties. In both cases, when they cleared the toxicity from their systems, the next steps in their growth evolved in a natural and clear way. They didn’t have to exert a great deal of effort or willpower to try and make things happen. Instead, the things that needed to happen to accelerate their growth found them. All they had to do was stand up for themselves and rise to the occasion.
Barbara stood up for herself by rejecting the negative attacks that were intended to demean her and claimed her self-respect instead. When she stood up for herself, she found that she could laugh and be happy. Frank stood up for himself by coming out of his shell. He stopped hiding from life and was finally seen as the competent, responsible, and highly intelligent person he really was.
Barbara furthered her growth and consolidated her inner center by rejecting the negative that had dominated her life since her early childhood. In standing up for herself, she broke the last vestiges of control, as well as the accompanying emotional deprivation, that her childhood conditioning had exerted over her. Frank achieved the same objectives by accepting the positive in his life. He stood up for himself by stretching beyond the limits of his past negative experience. He accepted his promotions. He went to Washington, and he allowed loving women into his life.
Barbara and Frank’s methods of standing up for themselves, while diametrically different, served the same ends. Both strategies allowed them to put the toxic shame that had dominated their childhoods behind them. Barbara found her strength in standing up for herself and expressing her feelings. Frank found his self-respect in accepting his professional opportunities and his self-worth in accepting unconditional love. By accepting love from decent, strong, and compassionate women, he proved his mother wrong. He was loveable after all.