Resetting The Emotional Clock

C.O - © Carl Westergren

Resetting Barbara’s Emotional Clock

The rapid vibrating of Barbara’s body was her system’s method of resetting her emotional clock and accelerating the energies in her emotional body so that they might catch up to her chronological age. When her body stopped vibrating, one part of her would no longer be in its mid- sixties, while the other part of her stayed stuck in shame at age six. Now her chronological age and her emotional life would be synchronized at the same level of maturity.

Venturing Outside the Box

As a child, she always had to be vigilant and on guard, constantly looking over her shoulder for the criticism that was sure to come her way if she dared to step out of the box into which her circumstances had forced her. She had had no choice but to be what someone else had wanted her to be. Now the compulsion to please, and the fear, shame, need, and rage that had been stuck in her body since early childhood were cleared from her system. She had ventured outside the box of her childhood conditioning and would never be the same again.

The “endure to survive” theme that had dominated her childhood and sabotaged her adult years would no longer control her. She was no longer firmly entrenched on the path of most resistance. Barbara’s healing experience taught her that change could happen at any age and that it was indeed possible to teach an old dog new tricks.

Signs of Transformation

The first outward sign of Barbara’s growth occurred in an interaction with an old friend. For many years, she had considered this particular woman her best friend. Yet this woman consistently irritated and upset her. Until now, Barbara had never really examined the source of that irritation. She had just thought that her feelings were due to a hidden flaw within herself, rather than to a problem with her friend. Instead of being able to look objectively at her friendship, she had internalized her feelings and blamed herself. The shame that her mother had instilled in her as a child had created low self-esteem and led her to blame herself whenever anything went wrong. Now that she was clearer and more confident in herself, she realized that the irritation she experienced whenever she was with this woman occurred because her friend routinely used her and treated her dismissively.

The next time her friend called and said something that upset her, Barbara told her exactly how she felt about being treated in this manner. The woman then became very nasty, berating Barbara and treating her even more contemptuously. Barbara was not about to put up with that kind of treatment ever again. She told the woman that their friendship was over and hung up the phone. When she told me about it a few days later she was still feeling very proud of herself and couldn’t believe that she felt no remorse.

“Why should you?” I asked her. “All you did was tell her the truth.”

“I know,” she said, “but the old Barbara would have felt terrible and scared and done everything under the sun to put it back together. Now I couldn’t care less. I feel terrifically empowered. I never knew I could feel so good about myself.”

“Think about what happened with this woman,” I continued. “There’s more here than meets the eye. This was a very significant moment in your growth. Your friend was very much like your mother. They shared the same essential characteristic. By standing up to her you also symbolically stood up to your mother. Congratulations are in order. You just broke the unconscious governing belief that had ruled your life.”

The same need to stand up for herself began to occur in all of Barbara’s important relationships. A few weeks after telling her former friend the truth, her sons called. They wanted her to come over and watch the Super Bowl with them and their wives and bring some food with her. She told them that she hated sports and wasn’t about to be used for free food. If they wanted to see her, it would have to be something she liked to do, and they could supply the food. After all, they were now grown men.
Their reaction surprised her. She expected them to be very upset, but they were not upset at all. They fully agreed with her position and apologized for their behavior. Since that conversation, their relationship is on an entirely different plane. They now have a mother they respect and are proud of. They even cook her dinner.

When Loss is an Advantage

For Barbara, the lesson in standing up for herself was clear and simple. She lost those people who were not her real friends, made new ones to replace them who were much more positive than the old ones, and gained the respect of those that really mattered to her. In terms of her growth, her losses were really gains. She lost what didn’t matter and was no longer relevant to her growth. By rejecting negative people she affirmed her own self-worth, increased her personal power, and protected her core self.

The Truth About Dying

Life Beyond the Physical Plane

Science tells us that nature abhors a vacuum. When we die, we do not turn to dust and bleached bones in the ground. Dust and bones are merely the remains of the body. Our body is the vehicle that houses and transports our soul while we are here on earth. While the remains of the body are ours, those remains are not who we are. This is a crucial distinction.

At death, the electromagnetic energy field that contains the spirit/soul/mind is no longer tethered to the physical plane by the physical body. When we die, the invisible silver cord linking the soul to the body is broken, and the soul returns to its home on the astral plane. Where we go in the astral worlds when we leave the body at death depends on how much or how little spiritual light we built into our system while we were here.

In this world, the soul is hidden and clothed in flesh. In the higher worlds, the soul stands revealed in its own light. That light is the real body of the soul. The brighter the light, the more powerful and evolved the soul has become.

The Story of Paula and Ted

My friend Paula once told me the story of her husband Ted’s death. Ted had been in declining health for a long time, and one day he had a heart attack. Paula called 911. The medics arrived quickly and were able to revive him. Paula, of course, was greatly relieved. Ted, however, was not. After he recovered, he scolded Paula.
“Listen,” he said in the no nonsense manner that was his trademark, “the next time that happens don’t try to bring me back.”
“Why Ted?” Paula asked him, a hint of panic in her voice.

“Paula, I was out of my body, experiencing more peace than I ever knew existed. I was in a very bright place. It was so light and so beautiful, better than anything I ever experienced here, I’ll tell you that. I’m not afraid to die now. I love you very much, Paula, and I don’t want to leave you behind, but my time is coming soon. I know it, and you know it. It won’t be much longer. That’s just the way it is. You promise to let me go next time, Paula? No more calls to 911?”

“Okay Ted,” Paula told him reluctantly. “I promise.”

A few months later Ted had another heart attack. This time Paula stilled her panic and remembered her promise. Instead of reaching for the phone, she reached for Ted’s hand and held him as he died.

“Alan,” she told me years later when she could talk about losing Ted without emotion, “when Ted died, I could see his spirit rise out of him and go up through the ceiling.”

“What did it look like?” I asked her.

“It was a long strand of silvery white light,” she replied without hesitation. “And that’s not all. When he left his body there was a feeling of deep peace in the room. Knowing that he was at peace made his death a lot easier for me to bear. It also helped me let go of my own fears about dying.”

Life is hard and unrelenting, and will always challenge us to grow. As Ted was fond of saying, “That’s just the way it is.”